“Should my homeschool graduate go to college?” Everyone, it seems, is ready to give an opinion on whether or not your teen should go to college and whether 4 year college degrees actually matter. And while a lot of the discussion seems to center around the idea that each unique child’s experience and needs will be different, there does seem to be a growing assumption that college degrees don’t really matter. So when I saw Molly Nickles from @themodernhomeschooler on Instagram discussing her and her husband’s experiences as adult professionals without four-year degrees (and how that is impacting the way they’re thinking about college decisions with their homeschooled high schoolers), I knew this was a perspective worth sharing. I hope Molly’s guest article is as thought provoking for you as it was for me!
- No four-year degrees, and we’re doing better than fine
- Unexpected consequences: that piece of paper actually mattered?!
- Is it right? No. But the world still values 4-year college degrees.
- Changed perspective on college
- We can value the trades and also value college degrees
- Homeschoolers experience peer pressure, too
- More homeschooling high school resources
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No four-year degrees, and we’re doing better than fine
“My husband and I don’t have four-year degrees, and we’re doing better financially than a lot of people, including my brother and sister, who both have degrees.” I’ve argued this point for 15 years whenever the subject of college came up. I hate to admit that there was a sinful level of pride and arrogance when I said it, too.
My husband received his two-year degree—an Associate in Technology from a community college. He took a myriad of certifications (like MCSE, Fortinet, and CISCO Systems for those who’d understand the lingo), and when he was 21 years old, he was hired in his dream job as an electronic technician for the power company. He was making great money right off the bat in 2001. Take that four-year degree!
In 2002, I dropped out of photography college halfway through my 3-year program. I had known since I was 12 that I wanted to be a photographer, but a year and a half in, I couldn’t decide which kind of photographer. My schooling was completely with film, and my career choice at the time was not nearly as popular as it is now, post the 2008 housing market crash, when I noticed the photographey-as-a-carreer floodgates open. So picking a type of photography that would make money was hard.
Ben held the same job for the Public Utility District for 19 years. He worked his way up in rank and continued his education with bootcamps and certifications. He was homeschooled with Abeka K-12, and I loved telling the homeschooling naysayers that a homeschooler was responsible for making sure terrorists couldn’t hack our power grid.
During his 19 years at the power company, Ben and I built a successful commercial and wedding photography business. I worked at it full time, while he shot with me on the weekends. We became the preferred photographers at some of the most sought after wedding venues in Eastern Washington.
Unexpected consequences: that piece of paper actually mattered?!
Fast forward to 2019. We felt the urge to move out of state. Ben had applied to a lot of jobs all over the country, but one thing kept stopping him from getting interviews: a 4-year degree. Even with his nearly 20 years of experience, a multitude of certifications, and stellar references, his lack of 4-year degree stopped him from getting jobs remotely in his current pay range. He didn’t have the title of “engineer” but had done the job of one, with pay that reflected that.
It took a solid year of applying to over 100 jobs before the Lord opened up one single opportunity in Arkansas. He still had to take a $10k pay cut to accept the role. This company gave him the title of “engineer,” too! (The tech industry doesn’t require passing the PE to have the title).
In the Lord’s timing, we had already decided to stop our photography business after 2019 to get our summers back while our kids were at home. People thought we were crazy to quit such a successful business, but as we shot our last wedding in December of 2019, we were at peace. Only God knew that just 2 short months later, our company would have folded anyway!
I pivoted from photography to become a DM Rep for a curriculum company. It was part-time, and I was able to use my decade of marketing and sales experience. I was quickly promoted to Marketing Manager. 2 years later, I applied to a much larger company. A year into working there, I was promoted again to the current position I’m in, managing 8 people.
5 years ago, I had no plans of climbing the corporate ladder. It kind of fell into my lap. But here I am with only 3 years left before my youngest graduates high school and a thriving corporate career that I could work in for the next 20 years.
I currently report to the Vice President of Marketing. I have nowhere to go except to the executive level. And guess what that requires: a 4-year degree. The marketing industry still highly values this 4-year degree, even if it was given 20 years ago. Can you imagine using marketing knowledge from 20 years ago to run a business? Ha!
Is it right? No. But the world still values 4-year college degrees.
Is it right that the world values 4-year degrees in areas of study that don’t matter to have them? No. But it’s how the world is. We can disagree with it all we want, but at the end of the day, 4-year degrees do still matter.
God has been gracious, allowing us to find companies willing to overlook the four-year degree, and He can no doubt do the same for your child if He sees fit.
However…
Changed perspective on college
This experience has totally rocked my world, changing how I think about college. A college degree didn’t matter until twenty years later.
More importantly, I don’t want to stand in the way of my children if they feel called to go to college. As a parent of teenagers, I understand how remarkable my parents were in that they didn’t bat an eye at their daughter wanting to go to art school in southern California in the early 2000s. My parents supported my passion. What I learned at college serves me to this day! I’m so thankful my parents didn’t try to talk me into a “safe” career or one that didn’t require college at the time. I’ve used my photography for churches, Christian ministries, Bible camps, and (this June) on a mission trip to South Africa.
As my almost 17-year-old continues to talk about wanting to be a public policy or tech lawyer, I want to support him fully. He loves the Lord and is serious about his interests. And yet, telling other homeschooling moms that my son wants to be a white-collar lawyer and is looking at 7 years of college is met with “Oh… that’s…nice.”
We can value the trades and also value college degrees
I love Mike Rowe and all he’s done for the trades over the past decade. I love the trades’ resurgence, but the pendulum seems to be swinging so far in the other direction that I find myself having to stick up for our support of a four-year college degree. And I have to make sure not to do it when my son is around so he isn’t shamed—like somehow it’s his fault that he doesn’t like fixing cars or taking apart computers.
It would be much easier for me if he were a sports-loving, construction-loving, fix-it dude. But he’s a sensitive philosopher who loves to discuss predestination and then write dystopian stories.
Homeschoolers experience peer pressure, too
I’m not for or against kids going to college. As our story shows, God still has given us wonderful jobs that we are both thankful for. I may have to practice contentment in my current role for the next 20 years. And I will still choose gratitude when so many have a hard time finding any job at all.
What I am against is allowing current public opinion in the homeschooling community to sway what God is trying to do in my kids’ lives. For as much as we can all agree that knowing how to fix the car, repair sheetrock, or grow vegetables are invaluable life skills, I hope that if God has clearly made your child for something different, like helping people with their taxes, creating compelling stories through video marketing, or writing new laws (maybe my son will work for HSLDA one day!), that you’ll follow your student’s passions and support them.
Ben and I have spent 16 years pouring into our kid’s lives. We have taught them to think critically and logically, discuss opinions graciously, and, most importantly, do all through the lens of the gospel.
I trust that through this parenting, I can follow my almost young adult’s lead into what God is calling them to do, whether that includes college or not.
Molly Nickles lives with her husband and two teenagers in Little Rock, Arkansas. She works remotely and full-time for Veritas Press as the Marketing and Sales Operations Manager. After traditionally homeschooling her two kids until 8th grade, she transitioned them into live online classes through Veritas. In their free time, her family loves to road trip across the U.S., with a goal of seeing all 50 states before their oldest graduates. They only have four states left and 2 years to complete it!
More homeschooling high school resources
- How to Create a Unique Homeschool Graduation
- 3 Things I’ve Learned as a Mom of a Homeschool Graduate
- Raising Our Expectations: Homeschooling the High School Years
- Homeschooling High School: Transforming Worries into Triumphs
- How to be successful with online homeschool classes
- Parenting Teens: the Most Asked Questions and a Real Mom’s Answers
- WW2 For Teens: Resources For Your Homeschool Study
- Homeschooling for College Credit (with Jennifer Cook-DeRosa)
- Conversations, Relationships, and a Charlotte-Mason Education During High School (with Jami Marstall)
- Tweens, Teens, and other Homeschooling Joys and Challenges (with Jessica Jensen)
- High School Science at Home (with Dr. Kristin Moon)
- Creatively Homeschool High School with Out-of-the-Box Teens (an interview with Heather Woodie)
- Homeschooling High School with Confidence, Competence, and Contentment (a video interview with Ann Karako)
- Homeschool High School: Free Curriculum Plan for US Government and Economics Courses
- “How to Create Your Own Homeschool High School Curriculum”
- 8 Outstanding Poetry Activities For High School
I enjoyed your perspective! There are so many paths that lead to a great life for our kids and it doesn’t have to be a straightforward path.
Yes, I thought Molly had some great reminders for all of us, regardless of the paths our kids pursue.
Thank you for this article!
I’m so glad you found it helpful!
9 of our 11 children have graduated from our homeschool. 2 have 4-year degrees, 1 went to trade school and has an associate’s degree, 1 went straight into missions and is now serving in Rwanda with her husband and 4 kiddos, and 5 have entered the work force.
A few things I’ve learned along the way:
– those post-high school years are super formative; college or not, pray and help your student to develop a 4 or 5 year plan
– college profs are your student’s mentors; make finding Godly profs a top priority in college selection
– pray, pray, pray for your child’s walk with the Lord. Nothing else compares in importance!
Wise words, thank you for sharing!